"It depends," said the Enneagram Six.

Every Enneagram number seems to have their own catch phrase (I'd love to hear yours if you have one!) and for the Enneagram Six it seems to be, "it depends." For every action an Enneagram Six takes, there are seemingly endless questions, possibilities and considerations, stressors, strategies and solutions, facts and, of course, figures that can be considered before moving forward. Phew, I'm already exhausted. I wonder what it's like to be in the mind of an Enneagram Six ...

Be prepared

I don't know that it is ever possible to fully understand the inner world of any Enneagram number outside of your own. I don't know if anyone, besides an Enneagram Six, can feel the constantly simmering anxiety around the search for certainty; the idea that one more question may settle things down in your head and help make the next step forward feel sure and confident.

Many of us question, many of us search for certainty, many of us want to "know" more about our decisions and life in general. We all have a version of Enneagram Six in us. If we're being honest, it's probably what has kept us alive up until this point. Using the skills of the Enneagram Six is using the skills of our natural humanity; seeing danger and responding, considering different approaches before moving forward, creating a plan b, c, d ... when life surprises us. These are good and important skills, life-changing skills. The Enneagram Six is the example of awareness of safety - some of us could probably use a bit more Enneagram Six in our lives.

But what if it works out ...

In classic Enneagram Six style, let's consider the other side ...

There are always two sides to an issue, on this, the Six has it completely right. You can attempt to be prepared for everything (some call it being "over-prepared") or you can be underprepared and completely thrown off by what comes next. But what if there's a third way. What if the options aren't 1) everything works out, or 2) nothing works out, what if the third option is, things work out in a way I hadn't anticipated?

I can already feel the questions stirring in the Enneagram Six mind ... but how can you be sure of that??? I know, I was thinking the same thing. The third way requires trust in something both inside and outside of us. The third way requires us to trust that we have asked enough questions and have contributed our good and healthy wisdom on an issue and then it requires us to trust that others have done the same.

The third way requires a belief in collective action, the belief that everything we do contributes to the whole and that what we and others contribute is more than enough to move things forward. The third way is not always being able to see the end before we begin.

Let's be honest, the third way is a huge risk. But what if it works out better than our one mind can question, consider or understand?

Long-Term Planning

What a nice thought, just trust in the idea of things working out and the internal pit of anxiety will vanish. I wish it was like that and I wish I was naive enough to suggest that for us.

Our move forward isn't simply forgetting old patterns of stress and flipping a switch for more trust. The move forward is noticing; noticing when we get trapped in a search for impossible certainty, noticing when we move forward trusting in a third way. Yes, it is that simple. And yes, it is harder than it seems. It needs to be this way because, while some of our patterns were formed out of major events, so many of them have slowly been engrained into our beings little-by-little as we adjusted to the experiences around us.

The truth is, I don't believe there is anything wrong with us. I believe we are regular human beings that have figured out how to live the life we were dropped into. We are fascinating creatures that are capable of learning at any stage of the game. So let's use that natural bent towards curiosity we pretend we don't have anymore. Start noticing what makes you, YOU. Notice when anxiety seems to keep you stuck. Notice when it doesn't. Both have information for you about YOU.

And so, for the Enneagram Six in each of us:

Today, I affirm my incredible ability to notice the subtle nuances and details that others may overlook. My keen observation skills are a testament to my depth of insight and my commitment to understanding the world around me. I will trust in my instincts and embrace the ways my incredible wisdom and strength contribute to the collective.